Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Note to the Local Weatherman

Dear Local Weatherman,

When the first severe weather siren went off last night, we were already in the basement. The oldest was chatting with a friend. The two little ones were putting together a puzzle. Disney Channel was playing in the background.

We had been hearing all day that a bad storm was headed our way. Through my twitter feeds, I knew we only had about twenty minutes before it was in our immediate area.

We had already prepared.

There was a flashlight that worked on the bookshelf. The windows were closed and the dogs were inside. As previously mentioned, we were already in the basement.

The hail came first. I muted the television set and hushed the kids. For a few seconds, I listened as it bounced off the roof and sides of our house.

Not long after, the siren went off a second time. I could hear the wind. It was vicious. With a crash, the sky let loose.

My husband looked up from his phone.

“Huh, it’s coming down pretty hard.” he observed.

The kids didn’t notice. It didn’t last long.

A Facebook update confirmed my suspicions. The storm was out of our area. For extra precaution, we stayed in the basement a little while longer. Then we began our nightly bedtime routines.

Once the kids were down for the night, I settled in to watch the long awaited return of Glee. It had been weeks since a new episode aired, and to say that I was gleeful would be an understatement.

I just knew this was going to be a good one. The first twenty minutes had me smiling in delight.

Then, I see your face instead of Will Schuester's.

At first, I was confused. The storm was long gone. TiVo…I remembered. Silently, I laughed at myself.

Your enthusiasm for the weather was endearing. You were the epitome of calmness while describing the unrelenting, fierceness of this storm.

Five minutes passed. I began to wonder how much of the show I was going to end up missing. My husband noticed the panic on my face.

He began to fast forward. Twenty minutes and it was still your broadcast. In warped speed, I saw weather maps, your face and various sizes of hail.

After forty minutes, it was maps, video of rain, various sizes of hail and more of your face.

Then the recording ended.

I stopped breathing.

“Don’t worry,” my husband assured me. “I recorded that Raising Hope show in case something like this happened.”

I let out a sigh of relief. He pressed play.

Your face. Maps. Rain. Hail. YOUR FACE!

For an hour and a half, you reported on a storm…a storm that lasted no longer than ten minutes in any one area.

I understand you were “just doing your job.” I am not criticizing your thoroughness or dedication. You were quite successful in making the storm out to be something it was not.

Your self-indulgence does not go unnoticed nor does your flair for the dramatics.

Your extensive knowledge of the various sized shapes of hail (marble, ping pong and golf) and your technical ability with weather maps is outstanding.

However, in this particular situation, bigger is not better.

Your competition was able to provide accurate, up-to-date information without a single interruption in their regularly scheduled programs.

Because of your arrogance, I missed a much anticipated television program. You stole my relaxation, my entertainment and my time.

In the future, please consider taking your performance to a more appropriate format, such as The Weather Channel.

A Momma Who Needs Her Glee


RoryBore said...Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

LOL....give em Hell! nothing worse than settling down at the end of a long day to watch something you have been looking forward to all day.....and then it's not there because of something more "important" someone's ego! hmmph. you should write a letter too! LOL

Reccewife said...Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

oh no! Can you watch it online? I know our Canadian stations show full episodes of Glee online the day after it airs.
And in other news, you're hilarious :)

Mrs. R said...Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

They LIVE for those storms! I swear they dream of tornados and hail storms at night.

Meanwhile...I need my Glee too!

The Glamorous Army Wife said...Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

LOL. I like the weather channel but hate local news. I also wish I had started watching Glee when it came out because I hate starting something after it's established. Now I will have to wait until I can rent the DVDs. As for the storms...I wish. It's just cold and cloudy here. Feels more like fall than spring.

Shell said...Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

Oh, I hate missing my shows for something like that!

Pam said...Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

Thank you for stopping by my blog this week. I came here to return the favor and noticed that you and I have the same thing in common - those irritating weather people taking over our TV shows. I HATE IT! Why don't think like that happen when nothing is on - like Saturday nights....DUMB!


Brandy Nelson said...Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

Love this site! You are a VERY talented writer! Thanks for following. I am happy to be your newest follower!